“When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated.” ~ Brené Brown.
Watch its entirety because I created a book and it's yours to have and keep absolutely free!
In this video, I share a personal story and how not all boundaries are received well, especially if it's by people that most benefitted from keeping quiet and tolerating undesired behavior.
Boundaries define who you are and who you are not. What you want and don’t want. Boundaries are what determine our self-worth. If we want to feel worthy of love and respect, we have to have a boundary that reinforces that.
Just like boundaries are about containing ourselves, they're also about preserving ourselves. They are about keeping undesired behaviors.
For most of my adult life, I was unable to distinguish between the benevolent warrior in me from the heart-less soldier I had embodied.
Often unable to distinguish the difference between a healthy relationship from the battles that occurred inside of me.
Most often I was afraid to open my heart and let go of the need to protect it from being abandoned, ignored, and heartbroken.
Feeding the hungry, wounded warrior inside me that so desperately sought to feed and protect its internal fragmentation with ungrounded materialism, obsession with accumulation, infidelity, and empty external distractions.
Bouncing from one toxic relationship to the next further intensifying the unstable bridge between my heart and my unresolved emotions. Ignoring and not tending to my wounds, disregarding the reflection of my chaos in the world around me.
...but I went too far for too long.
Grasping. Clawing. Desperately seeking and overlooking the love that exists inside and around me.
In my last...
THE POWER OF SURRENDERING
Surrendering to something usually triggers signs of weakness or cowardly behavior, especially if we're not in touch with what is tangible and it's so hard to leave something that's very familiar, like a dysfunctional relationship, or if we lose our job, we find it very painful to deal with uncertainty. But this is where we get to practice peaceful surrendering of what is occurring in front of us.
It's accepting those likes and dislikes and doing away with what the mind wants and really reconnecting back to our hearts with that clarity. To tune in to what is being asked of us during that situation.
So the question is, what would you be doing differently if you didn't resist the situation if you didn't like or dislike something. How different would you be influenced by how you are living in this moment?
Surrendering is such an interesting concept and it's often very difficult for us, especially if we want to be able to control a situation because...
Honest question for you.
Do you find yourself trying to control how people view you?
What they think about you?
What they say about you?
How they experience you?
And is this cycle of serving others over yourself exhausting the hell out of you and zapping your energy?
If you’re nodding your head "yes" at your screen right now, but aren’t sure how to stop this sneaky habit, I have something I know you’re gonna dig.
What is it?
I was LIVE on Instagram. You can also watch it here on @divinesoulconnection to talk about it.
Enjoy and feel free
Answer the following questions to help you understand why it feels like a discrepancy between your authentic self and the person you needed to be.